Worried about breast cancer, ladies? Try walking around in the dark:

Women who live in neighborhoods with large amounts of nighttime illumination are more likely to get breast cancer than those who live in areas where nocturnal darkness prevails, according to an unusual study that overlaid satellite images of Earth onto cancer registries.

No, it's not that cancer is being underreported in rural areas. Streetlights actually do cause cancer (but only in boobies).

So ladies, when you're out and about at night make sure you only walk down dark alleys and avoid streetlights at all costs. Remember, it's for your own good.