Ravenwood - 12/31/04 04:00 PM
Washington State counted their votes three different times, with the Republican candidate winning the initial count and official recount, and the Democrat candidate winning the suplimental hand recount. When they got to the vote tally that said the Democrat had won, the counters stopped counting and the Dems declared victory. Where did they get the number three?* Then thou must count to three. Three shall be the number of the counting and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither shalt thou count two, excepting that thou then proceedeth to three. Five is right out.
But there is something more than a little fishy going on in Seattle and King County. First there were those 700 new ballots that just happened to show up at the last minute. And Stefan Sharkansky thinks it's just a little odd that King County has 3,539 more votes than participating voters.
What appears to be happening is that votes are disappearing and reappearing. These aren't ballots where the selection is changing, but several hundred actual slips of paper that are disappearing in some precincts and reappearing in others.
All is not right in Washington.
*A reading from the Book of Armaments, Chapter 4, Verses 16 to 20:
Then did he raise on high the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, saying, "Bless this, O Lord, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy." And the people did rejoice and did feast upon the lambs and toads and tree-sloths and fruit-bats and orangutans and breakfast cereals ... Now did the Lord say, "First thou pullest the Holy Pin. Then thou must count to three. Three shall be the number of the counting and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither shalt thou count two, excepting that thou then proceedeth to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the number of the counting, be reached, then lobbest thou the Holy Hand Grenade in the direction of thine foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it."
It's a "win" at this point by 42 votes or so, which should make Mr. Rossi think twice about all those 60-odd thousand libertarian votes that he didn't get. Yeah, it's only
He should have said something about guns or freedom, huh? - probably too late now, unless they get to vote again up there.
Hey, that funny stuff sounds like Monty Python? Isn't it?
Posted by: Jimmy Antley at December 31, 2004 11:25 PMWho gets to play the killer rabbit in this scenario? ;^)
How refreshing to be reminded of something so funny while reading of such B.S. in Washington.
If I may share:
Tim: Follow. But. Follow only if ye be men of valour, for the entrance to this cave is guarded by a creature so foul, so cruel that no man yet has fought with it and lived. Bones of full fifty men lie strewn about its lair. So, brave knights, if you do doubt your courage or your strength, come no further, for death awaits you all with nasty, big, pointy teeth.
King Arthur: What an eccentric performance.
Tim the Enchanter: There he is!
King Arthur: Where?
Tim the Enchanter: There!
King Arthur: What? Behind the rabbit?
Tim the Enchanter: It IS the rabbit!
King Arthur: You silly sod!
Tim the Enchanter: What?
King Arthur: You got us all worked up!
Tim the Enchanter: Well, that's no ordinary rabbit.
King Arthur: Ohh.
Tim the Enchanter: That's the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on!
Sir Robin: You tit! I soiled my armor I was so scared!
Tim the Enchanter: Look, that rabbit's got a vicious streak a mile wide! It's a killer!
Sir Galahad: Get stuffed!
Tim the Enchanter: He'll do you up a treat, mate.
Sir Galahad: Oh yeah?
Sir Robin: You mangy Scots git!
Tim the Enchanter: I'm warning you!
Sir Robin: What's he do? Nibble your bum?
Tim the Enchanter: He's got huge, sharp - eh - he can leap about - look at the bones!
King Arthur: Go on, Bors. Chop his head off!
Bors: Right! Silly little bleeder. One rabbit stew comin' right up!
[after Bors is killed by the killer rabbit]
Tim the Enchanter: I WARNED you, but did you listen to me? Oh, no, you know, didn't you? Oh, it's just a harmless little BUNNY, isn't it?
[Holding the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch]
King Arthur: How does it... um... how does it work?
Lancelot: I know not, my liege.
King Arthur: Consult the Book of Armaments.
Brother Maynard: Armaments, chapter two, verses nine through twenty-one.
Cleric: [reading] And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, "O Lord, bless this thy hand grenade, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy." And the Lord did grin. And the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths, and carp and anchovies, and orangutans and breakfast cereals, and fruit-bats and large chu...
Brother Maynard: Skip a bit, Brother...
Cleric: And the Lord spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.
Brother Maynard: Amen.
All: Amen.
King Arthur: Right. One... two... five.
Galahad: Three, sir.
King Arthur: Three.
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