This from the latest global warming scare story:

A giant ice shelf the size of 11,000 football fields has snapped free from Canada's Arctic, scientists said.

Since when did football fields become a unit of measure like feet or yards? Usually when you talk about something being as big as a football field, you do it so the reader can visualize the size comparison. But who can really visualize 11,000 football fields, as opposed to 5,000 football fields. Would they say 20,000 football fields for an ice sheet twice the size of this one? And are the football fields end-to-end or just clumped together?

A better literary analogy would be "an ice shelf the size of Manhattan" or "the size of Rhode Island" or however big it is.

Funny:

Take your Award - Mr. Smallest ramrod 2006

I'd like to thank the academy...

Warren Messner and three other teens were convicted for beating Michael Roberts, a homeless man, to death. Messner was sentenced to 22 years in prison without the possibility of parole for jumping up and down on the mans chest, crushing his ribs. He showed no remorse at his trial, but after a few months in jail Messner's tune has changed.

He didn't feel bad then, but he does now. He has been in juvenile detention for eight months, locked in a small cell and occasionally allowed to go to class.

Messner and his attorney said he has already learned his lesson and is ready to go home to help others.

Reminds me of Raising Arizona:

Ed McDonnough: You mean you busted out of jail.
Evelle: No, ma'am. We released ourselves on our own recognizance.
Gale: What my brother here means to say is that we felt that the institution no longer had anything to offer us.

"I want to be an inspirational speaker for troubled teens," he said Monday.

Messner got the lightest sentence of the four boys. Teens Jeffrey Spurgeon, Justin Stearns and Christopher Scamahorn got 27 to 35 years. They all cut plea deals to avoid life in prison.

The state attorney said that's as much leniency as they should get and the judge agreed.

"I can't think of some reason to change the sentence. I'm going to deny the motion," said the Hon. Joseph Will.

Messner's parents broke down at the denial. His mother said it's unfair, that her son fell in with a bad crowd and prison is killing him.

"He's not getting the mental health, the schooling. He's not getting anything, anything but locked in a cell all day long," Lori Messner said.

Michael Roberts could not be reached for comment.

The judge and the state both argued that being deprived services and being locked away is precisely the point of prison. Warren Messner will spend the next 22 years in prison without the chance for parole.

It reminds me of HBO's America Undercover look at life inside of Lewisburg Federal Penitentiary. Their interview of an inmate went something like this:

INMATE: I believe that if you forgive yourself in the eyes of the Lord, than you should be set free of your bonds. And I've forgiven myself for what I've done, I've made amends, I think that I should be set free.

INTERVIEWER: What are you in for?

INMATE: [with a straight face] Triple murder. But I must have blacked out during that third murder, because they say I stabbed my sister 27 times and I only remember cutting her throat.

Cross posted at Dumb Criminals.