I know, I said I hate these lists, but I figured I'd throw one together to fill in the weekend lull. Here is my list of the most unrealistic TV Sitcoms. I decided to limit it to sitcoms, otherwise I'd be naming every sci-fi show this side of Star Trek. So, here goes.

In no particular order, the Most Unrealistic TV Sitcoms:

The Flying Nun - A cutie like Sally Field as a nun is almost as realistic as her ability to fly?
Gilligan's Island - Too many to mention, but I'll try: 15 years on that island, within radio range of Hawaii, same clothes week after week, Ginger and Mary Ann managing to keep from being gang-raped in a 'Lord of the Flies' style mating ritual? Puhleease.
A-Team - Ok, the A-Team wasn't exactly a sitcom, but still, all those bullets flying around, and the only person ever actually shot was B.A., and not Murdock.
I Dream of Jeannie - In reality, Jeannie would be a sex slave, and Major Nelson would be driving a Ferrari.
Bewitched - Lets see, magical powers, two different Dicks, both of whom are light in their loafers, and again with the 'don't use your powers' mantra.
Alf - That annoying little alien/muppet would have been strangled and eaten by a racoon his first five minutes on Earth.
Hogan's Heroes - Take your pick, a POW camp run by idiots, or a series that lasted longer than the actual war did. Still Nazi humor flew better in the 60s than it would today.
Dukes of Hazzard - How many of you actually grew up thinking that the police had to stop chasing you at the county line? Besides, in real life each time they were caught, Bo and Luke would have been pistol whipped so bad their own Uncle Jessie wouldn't have recognized them. Also those pretty boys would make good girlfriends for Hazzard's local yokels while in the pokie.
Adventures of Superman - No, it isn't Superman that is unbelievable, but his portrayal by a flabby George Reeves.
Mork and Mindy - I guess to parents and children of the 1970s, Robin Williams on cocaine looked a lot like a space alien. Now he just looks like Robin Williams on cocaine.
Knight Rider - A car that can do anything, and the driver wastes his time fighting crime? In real life Michael Knight would be drag racing for pink slips while hanging out the T-top.
Eight is Enough - Should have been 'One is Enough'

Shows that you may think should make the list, but don't.

Get Smart - This spy spoof wasn't supposed to be realistic
Taxi - Despite having all English speaking cab drivers, Taxi still doesn't make the list.
Cheers - Despite the fact that nobody ever paid for a beer.
Welcome Back Kotter - Despite the kids having only one class a day that lasted 2 1/2 minutes.
The Munsters and The Addams Family
Fantasy Island and Love Boat
Beverly Hillbillies
Partridge Family

I'm sure I left some out. Feel free to add your own in the comments.

Ugh. I am definately spoiled by broadband internet access. Using dial-up for the past 4 days has been very frustrating, and illustrates just how spoiled I really am when it comes to internet access.

The main reason for the lack of posts has been due to me staring at that damned hourglass while I wait for pages to load. Sigh.

Headlines like this continue to remind me that NASA is the biggest make-work organization in the world. While I agree that the 'space race' of the 1960's was an important show of technical prowess to the communists, since then, many missions are largely unnecessary. While science is important, I don't think that seizing taxpayer dollars at the point of a gun in the interest of scientific achievement is the best way to go about it.

NASA continues to try to grab headlines for the 'first' this, and 'longest' that, just to keep people interested and keep the money coming in from legislators. People in Cape Canaveral, Florida and Houston, Texas would probably argue for the other side, but only because their local economies depend so much on the large taxpayer funded organization.

The simple fact remains that a large amount of the work, especially simple satellite deployments can be done with unmanned rockets and not more expensive shuttle launches.

Kudos to Tennessee Governor Sundquist for standing up to pressure from vegans to proclaim a state wide "vegetarian month." The major concern with the proclamation is that the wording is too anti-meat. The proposal reads, "Our food supply should be safe and wholesome, rather than laced with pathogens, fat, cholesterol, hormones and carcinogens." Had the vegans worded the proclamation a bit less anti-meat and just pro-vegetable, the Governor would probably sign it.

Still, resolute in pushing their beliefs onto other people, the wacko-vegans are refusing to back down and claim that giving up meat is a positive thing and the proclamation should be endorsed.

The vegans probably won't have to wait long, because Sundquist gives up his post as Governor after this year. Tennessee elected a Democratic Governor which means that right after endorsing the passage of a state income tax, the new Governor will probably gladly sign the anti-meat endorsement.

Today is a day of thankfulness, feasting, football, and even birthday cake. No blogging today. (Unless of course the Redskins start losing)

Of course I'm Han Solo. I'll take a babe, a blaster, and a fast ride any day over some close quarters combat light saber and a lifetime of never getting the girl. Sure moving shit around with my mind would be cool, but if you can't use it to make chicks skirts fly up at the mall, who needs it?

(link via Quit That)

Kermit's gone mad! AHHH!!!

The NY Times shows a photo of Kermit, clearly feasting on several parade workers. Thankfully they threw a giant net over him and were able to minimize the carnage.

Al Gore seems to have misplaced his tin foil hat. Speaking to the New York Observer, he blamed the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy for poisoning the media with a conservative agenda.

"The media is kind of weird these days on politics, and there are some major institutional voices that are, truthfully speaking, part and parcel of the Republican Party," whined Gore.

"Fox News Network, The Washington Times, Rush Limbaugh - there's a bunch of them, and some of them are financed by wealthy ultra-conservative billionaires who make political deals with Republican administrations and the rest of the media," he said, apparently speaking about Rupert Murdoch.

"And then pretty soon the mainstream media goes out and disingenuously takes a so-called objective sampling, and lo and behold, these RNC talking points are woven into the fabric of the zeitgeist." Zietgeist? I knew that word of the day toilet paper would come in handy.

Gore's comments, combined with Daschle's whining last week, just goes to show how conservatives are breaking the liberal grip on the American media. As the democratic party creeps further and further to the left, their bitching and griping is starting to border on paranoid schizophrenia.

Carnival of the Vanities: The Ten Horned Beast has been posted at Silflay Hraka and Blogcritics.

I have arrived safely at my super secret undisclosed location. I will be here through the holiday, returning Sunday night, so posting will be a bit light.

Flying commercial instead of driving saved me a whopping 60 minutes, plus I got to suffer the indignity of having my socks and underwear fondled by a federalized, professionalized, TSA employee during a 'random' search. (Random meaning, the ticket lady looked at me and said, "You, go over there".)

About 3:30 AM, Delan "Rusty" Perry and his wife were awakened by the sound of breaking glass and their dogs barking. Perry carried a 12-gauge shotgun as he walked outside. After firing a warning shot into the air, an intruder identified as Samuel Soo Kim, started running toward him and shooting at him with a .22-caliber pistol.

Kim was pronounced DRT*, after receiving a sucking chest wound, from Rusty's shotgun. (Or as doctors put it, he was "killed by shotgun pellet wounds to the head and chest.")

Although Perry was arrested, Police released him with no charges filed. A further investigation shows that Kim had also shot one of his dogs, and vandalized an agricultural chilling house.

*Dead Right There

Massachusetts seen inflating gains in tobacco fight, reports the Boston Globe. While lawmakers have been taking credit for helping to curb smoking, the facts paint a very different picture:

Massachusetts, with the most expensive antitobacco campaign in history, has the third-lowest rate of smoking in the United States.

The campaign's supporters rarely mention that smoking was declining here before the antismoking campaign began in late 1993, or that the rate of decline has actually slowed since.

Most of the drop in smoking hasn't been caused by the once-ubiquitous antismoking ads, but by increases in the state cigarette tax, which has skyrocketed from 26 cents to $1.51 per pack.

I have to ask why a state should be permitted to seize tax money with the threat of lethal force, and use said tax money to pressure people to give up legal behavior they deem irresponsible and inappropriate.

If people want to smoke, let them. Contrary to what anti-smoking nazis claim, group health costs do not decline when people quit smoking. In fact, less smokers means more people hanging around into their 90s to take advantage of health care and retirement benefits. Not to mention that smokers already pay higher insurance premiums.

You have to love the L.A. Times sense of entitlement:

On Dec. 28, three days after the celebration of a man famous for helping the downtrodden, Republican scrooges and Democratic stooges in Congress will hand 800,000 Americans something far worse than a lump of coal: an end to unemployment benefits the Senate had earlier voted to extend.

Just when should unemployment 'benefits' end? Why is 39 weeks not enough? The L.A. Times wants to extend them indefinitely, rather than provide actual motivation to find a job.

I am reminded of something my mother did to me one winter. I was taking the spring semester off from college, and was hanging around the house in January. I worked for a landscaper, so I was on hiatus for the winter. At 7 AM, my mom busted down my bedroom door, ripped off the covers and kicked me in the ass. She told me to get the hell out and not come back until I had a job. I took the first job I was offered, and was back in bed by 7:45.

When I was in college, the BK at the Student Center took credit cards. They were largely responsible for my graduating with a staggering $12,000 of credit card debt. (That is about 3,000 value meals.)

McDonalds is already being sued for allowing fat people to eat there. This will probably prompt lawsuits claiming that McDonalds is responsible for the mountains of debt people are accumulating. Spiking their goodies with pickles and onions only exacerbates the problem.

Fox News reports that the GDP Rose at 4.0 Percent in Third Quarter, steeper than first calculated. Once I saw the headline, I checked a few other major news outlets to see who'd spin it down. Thanks to MSNBC for validating my hunch.

MSNBC runs the good economy article, but cannot help inserting a bad economy article right underneath it.

U.S. economic growth revised up - Gross domestic product expanded at 4% rate in 3rd quarter

YAY, the economy is doing well! Not so fast says MSNBC:

Economists see modest U.S. growth - Forecasts revised down but new recession seen unlikely

Apparently 'experts' still think that 2003 will be filled with gloom and doom.

"If they have to cut spending --- that takes money out of circulation." -- Carl Tubbesing, Executive Director of the National Conference of State Legislatures, concerned that budget crunches are causing governments to cut spending.

He's either really really stupid, or he's trying to teach 'economics of the liberal' to the masses.

This weekend I stopped by the bookstore and picked up a copy of Gods and Generals, the paintings of Mort Kunstler. It makes a good coffee table book, with lots of illustrations to offset the text. The text for the book happens to be written by my old Civil War professor Dr. James I. Robertson. Dr. Robertson is an Alumni Distinguished Professor at Virginia Tech, and an authority on General Stonewall Jackson. I have several of his books, but just hadn't gotten around to picking up this one.

I got a chance to socialize with Dr. Robertson when he was in Atlanta about two years ago, and he told me about his work as a historical consultant for an upcoming film. Gods and Generals is set to be released in February (with a limited release in December), and it looks to be a pretty good Civil War flick. The estimated running time is 3 hours and 30 minutes, with the directors cut running a staggering 5 hours and 25 minutes. Of course Dr. Robertson also hit me up for a donation to the Virginia Center for Civil War Studies at Virginia Tech, for which I gladly gave him a check.

Civil War history has always been a passion of mine, and I look forward to seeing the film when it opens. Until then, I'll be reading the illustrated book and checking out the unofficial web site (which has much more information than the official site). Also, one of these days before the movie opens I'll get around to picking up the novel that the movie is based on by Jeff M. Shaara.

NY Daily News reports that the NY City Council is not even going to listen to public debate prior to voting for an 18% property tax increase. They quote Councilman David Weprin (D-Queens), who heads the Finance Committee as saying "It's not like we haven't heard from the public. The public would rather not have a property tax increase."

Well isn't that just dandy. I hope his constituents remember his unwillingness to even listen to them when election time rolls around.

They also note that the NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg is upset because the four Republican Councilmen have already gone on record as saying they are not going to support the Mayor. While they didn't actually quote them, I imagine that when asked by Bloomberg to support the massive tax increase, their response ended in something like, "...and the horse you rode in on."

It would appear as though the domain is almost completely transferred over. There could still be some errant errors over the next few days, however. I figure this Thanksgiving week is going to be slow anyway, so it was the best time to do the change.

Please feel free to report any bugs to me via email or the feedback form.

The CGI counter still isn't working for some reason, but I'll figure it out when I have time.

UPDATE: To use server side scripting on my new web host, I had to change the file extensions to .shtml. That means permalinks will be affected.

It is always the small stuff that throws you for a loop. I spent an hour troubleshooting one CGI script to get the date to report correctly and it turned out all I needed to do was change the '/usr/bin/date' variable to '/bin/date'. Sigh.

"It makes me more accepting of the use of force to stop bad guys. I find now that I can support things like the war on Iraq. It's made me a lot more hawkish." -- Best selling author, Michael Crichton, telling how having been held at gunpoint (along with his 13-year old daughter), tied up, and robbed has changed his life.

It is always nice to see people open up to the realization that it is the threat of force that keeps the peace. Contrast this to Robert Fisk, who most certainly would have blamed himself and his neighbors for living too rich of a lifestyle.

The LA Times tells just how nice life is in South Central Los Angeles:

Where they go, what they wear, what they say, how loudly they play their car stereo: All are infused with - and circumscribed by - fear of an unexpected bullet. On peaceful looking, palm-lined streets, residents hurry inside when the light fades. They try not to draw attention. This is the way it is and has been for years.

It looks as though those gun control policies are working just as predicted. Honest, law abiding citizens live in abject fear for their lives, while thugs and gang-bangers rule the streets.

If you remember the L.A. riots of the 90s, it was the Korean store owners, armed to the teeth with shotguns and rifles who came through it virtually unscathed. These store owners were able to successfully defend their property and businesses with a show of force, yet they were not a threat to the public. Go figure?

Of course, you won't get that perspective by reading the Times. Instead, they blame the whole measure on poverty, and give some useful tips on how not to make yourself a target.

Don't wear blue and red..

Don't wear loud colors, no yellow.

Wear black or gray; neutral colors that will not attract attention.

... adding that jewelry or attention-grabbing sneakers are also no-nos.

Once out the door, know where you are going.

Avoid side streets, stick to main thoroughfares and don't look tough.

You can't look too hard [at anyone].

Pick your words carefully.

The same rules apply to music ...Certain songs in certain parts of town invite trouble.

Don't crank up your car stereo so much it drowns out somebody else's. They may take it as the ultimate offense, a sign of disrespect.

It sounds like a wonderful way to live, doesn't it. They should incorporate the Washington Post list of survival tips, which included not walking in a straight line, and hiding under your car while pumping gas.

Students in five states rioted after football games this weekend.

Can anyone give me a reason why students caught and convicted of riotting shouldn't be expelled?

Memphis, the city that worships an overweight drug addict who overdosed in his own bathroom, is pondering white-washing Civil War history, because somebody might get 'offended'.

The grand irony behind the movement to strip the names off of Confederate Park, Jefferson Davis Park, and Forrest Park, is that the idea came up during a visit from HBO officials during last year's Lennox Lewis-Mike Tyson fight. The city that bent over backward to court a visit by a convicted rapist, is suddenly worried about what people might think.

I don't know about you, but I find the idea offensive.

When the BCS was formed, they created a special 'Big East' rule because they were worried about the weakness of the conference. Perhaps now they need to make an 'ACC rule'.

Florida State, who is ranked 22 and 23 in this week's AP and CNN polls, managed to clinch the ACC outright, despite their loss to NC State this weekend. Clinching the ACC means that they automatically receive a bid to a major BCS bowl. If FSU loses next week to arch-rival Florida, they could go into the BCS bowl unranked, and with 5 losses. Wouldn't that be a hoot?

Pubs in London are being fined for not stopping patrons from dancing or even 'swaying' to the music. Under British law, pubs must have an entertainment license to allow dancing. Getting a license can be a bureaucratic nightmare filled with red tape and financial kickbacks to local politicians.

This may sound like another odd piece of Eurotrash policy, but believe it or not, some localities in the U.S. have similar laws. My recent trip to New York City in October included a visit to a club that lacked an 'entertainment license'. Dancing or any type of 'rhythmic movement' to the music would get you a stern warning from the bouncer. Do it again, and they'd bounce you out on your ear.

The sad fact is, that we live in a world where you literally cannot take a shit without government intervention. Government licensing and control seeps into every facet of our lives, so much so that walking funny or 'moving rhythmically' can result in fines and punishment.

Laws like this may sound quirky or amusing, but the bottom line is that it is still a government agency using police power and the threat of lethal force to control and/or tax human behavior.

My old webhost seemed to be getting very very slow at times. Michele had such good things to say about Bloggerzone that I decided to give it a try.

The core weblog seems to work fine, and the speed is vastly improved. Some of the CGI is still a bit buggy until the domain transfers over. Because of that, I'm not sure how well my email is going to work. Also the CGI referrals don't seem to be working, and the counter is noticeably absent. I'll fix all that stuff once the domain transfers over and I'm sure the CGI is even executing locally.

Also, the photos in the weblog content are all broken. Since all the photos were put in the '/images/...' folder, they won't reappear until the domain transfers over. (Basically the leading slash removes the '~ravnwood' from the image tag.)

Since my old site used BerkeleyDB and the new host uses MYSQL, I had to reimport all the entry and comment data. That served to renumber all the 'permalinks'. Anyone who linked to any permalinks may want to adjust them accordingly.

This host is much faster and seems to work a lot better. Although it doubled my hosting costs, Ravenwood's Universe will still be offered free of charge and with no gratuitous begging.

With all the election year hoopla surrounding New Jersey, they were quickly cementing their position as the most ass-backwards ridiculous state of the United States. Feeling left out of the fray, West Virginia upped the ante and threw the prestigious award for 2002 Armpit of the Nation into question.

West Virginia University beat 13th ranked Virginia Tech on Wednesday night. Shortly after the victory, West Virginians took to the streets in Morgantown. They drove around honking their horns, jamming traffic for hours. They proceeded to trash the town and set dozens of fires. Cars were trampled and turned over, store windows were busted, utility poles were set ablaze. Police had to use riot gear and fire hoses to disperse the crowd.

What makes this more interesting than most post-game riots is that it occurred in Morgantown, West Virginia, home town of the WVU Mountaineers. The game, however, was played in Blacksburg, Virginia, home of the VT Hokies. Still, that didn't stop drunken West Virginian's from breaking into their own stadium and tearing down their own goal posts. Despite all the violence, only three people were arrested.

Top Kyoto Minister Admits He Has Two SUVs - Kyoto is only for the common people..

'Soft Money' Ban Evasion Alleged - Dems and GOP accused of evading Campaign Finance laws..

Sting's forest lobby attacks 'green' timber trade - 'Green' timber trade not so green, but that's ok with Greenpeace..

Shooting is 17th LA homicide in a week - Only 8 people (out of 3 million) are licensed to carry firearms in LA, yet they have the highest homicide rate in the U.S.

The Wilmington Delaware City Council has voted to mandate firearm's registration.

Owners of shotguns, handguns and rifles would have to register existing weapons as well as new ones when they are acquired. Police would issue a certificate that would have to accompany a weapon at all times.

Despite the bill being illegal under Delaware state law, the City Council has threatened to override a Mayoral veto. The bill passed 9-3, and only 9 votes are needed to override a veto. The delusions of the City Council are so off-beat I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

[Councilman Norman] Oliver, [who sponsored the bill] said he hopes it would help identify stolen guns and discourage criminals from carrying them.

[Councilman Gerard Kelly claims,] "We register cars. We register houses. We register pit bulls. This is no different."

One of the following, must be true. Either the Wilmington City Council is really fucking stupid, or this is part of their agenda to limit firearms ownership. If Oliver REALLY believes that rapists, murderers, and street gang thugs are going to be discouraged by having to carry an unregistered firearm, than he is unfit to serve public office. If he is merely pressing his anti-gun agenda onto law abiding citizens, than he is unfit to serve public office.

Kelly on the other hand is just a bald face liar. Registration of vehicles and registration of firearms are completely different animals. I'm not going to rehash the whole comparison, but I will point out that owning a vehicle requires no registration, nor is it a Constitutionally protected unalienable right.

(Credit Rodger Schultz for being on top of things)

Paul "Enron" Krugman, NY Times cry baby, does his part to fuel class envy and warfare. It would seem that Krugman has his panties in a bind over the statistical trend of rich parents having rich offspring and poor parents having poor offspring. Unfortunately, his piece offers little substance and fact and mostly just whines on and on about how the poor kids are left behind, while rich kids step on their heads while clambering up the ladder of success.

Krugman thinks that the evil rich are paving the way down easy street for their kids. They offer up lucrative jobs to their offspring, which of course require no amount of hard work what-so-ever. Meanwhile, poor kids are stuck in the ghetto working at the local McDonalds. Even those that work hard and take advantage of every single opportunity have no chance for success because their parents aren't rich enough. We are taught that the American dream is dictated by hard work and ambition, not who your father was, but to Krugman, that is all a bunch of crap.

What completely escapes Krugman is that upbringing has everything to do with success. Rich people typically continue to do things that make them rich, while poor people continue to do the things that make them poor. If parents think that it's ok to buy lottery tickets, cigarettes and beer while their un-open, unpaid, bills lay there on the coffee table, chances are the children are going to learn that lesson as well. On the other hand, when parents exude personal and fiscal responsibility, chances are their kids will follow in kind.

There is a reason why multi-million dollar lottery winners are often back to being dirt poor in less than 10 years.

It is those types of behavioral lessons that foster success. The statistical relationship to wealth is caused only by the fact that parents are not just teaching those lessons, but exhibiting them as well. That is exactly why people who start out with very little wealth are still able to be successful.

This topic is very personal to me, because my parents, while not wealthy by any stretch, taught me that hard work and determination pay off. My family was poor and came from a poor background. Still, by exhibiting a good work ethic, and good decision making, they managed to carve out a decent middle class living. By demonstrating good fiscal behavior, they taught both me and my sister the lessons needed for us to do the same.

Krugman, however, rather than stress the importance of good financial behavior and personal responsibility insists that income redistribution is necessary. That is, he would rather advocate the seizing of wealth with the threat of lethal force, than teach children the lessons of hard work and personal financial management.

There is a lot to be said for the old adage, "Give a man a fish and feed him for a day, teach a man to fish and feed him for a lifetime." Unfortunately, the lesson is lost on socialists like Krugman, who think other people's money is the solution to every problem.

Michele takes the time to rant about some dipshit anti-military, anti-war, anti-SUV, anti-capitalist moron* who's biggest accomplishment is managing not to get kicked out of school for three years.

Personally, I don't waste my time on dickheads* like this. If he wants to hate the military, that is fine by me. Hopefully some sailors stationed down there in San Diego will take this guy out for a few beers, get him laid (which he sounds like he desperately needs), and change his mind. Don't count on it though.

The substance of his rant is so cliche, it is immaterial. I could have added it all up and written it myself:

English major + Junior at a left coast college + An idiot* that even admits he cannot even find Kosovo on a map.

I'm just surprised he didn't use the term 'baby killer'.

* Footnote: My staff writers are insisting that I explain my actions of having resorted to name calling. While I never resort to name calling in an argument, I feel free to categorize people that go so far as to prove they are a moron and an idiot through a public editorial. In other words, if you write me to disagree with me, I might call you misguided, or something, but I'd never resort to a public 'attack' (which Dawn Olsen accused me of when she banned me). However, if you publish a blatantly idiotic editorial like this, I call a spade a spade.

"The county needs some money, so the quicker we can take the steps, the better... The county's kind of living from paycheck to paycheck." -- Richland County Commissioner Dave Swartz 'justifying' the need to raise the local sales tax rate a quarter point to 6.5%.

It must be nice to be able to go out and legally use lethal force to get more money when you're running short. Of course, when private citizens do that they go to jail.

Radly Balko writes a good column about the Libertarian relationship with the Republican party. In our modern two party system, being libertarian often puts you between a rock and a hard place. Or in some cases, between two rocks.

Balko responds to the recent Republican assertions that Libertarians are costing them seats in Congress:

...lots of Republicans see libertarians as extremists, hell-bent on "all or nothing" politics -- either we get privatized sidewalks and heroin on the playground, or we're going to vote for Ralph Nader.

What Republicans really need to understand is that they are simply the lesser of two evils. Although lately, not much lesser.

Either the programmers at Harvard are smoking crack, or the Chinese internet filtering is moodier than an ex-girlfriend who loaned you money. The first time I checked it, this site was accessible in China. When I checked it a few months later, this site was inaccessible. I checked it again just now, and I'm listed as accessible.

It reminds me of a moody bitch I dated once in college. She was all clingy and lovey dovey at first. Then she used to run from me whenever she saw me. (yes, she literally ran away) Later she was whining that I never called her anymore. Sheesh, what's a guy to do?

I wonder if their internet filtering looks for specific words on the site and then decides on the fly whether or not you are worthy of Chinese eyes. Or perhaps, the boneheads at Harvard don't know how to program for shit.

Either way, I'm keeping my 'Banned in China' graphic. Even if they did reconsider the ban and reinstate me to preferred website status.

At the beginning of the season I expected Virginia Tech to have a rough year. They were scheduled to play three tough non-conference teams, and would be playing an extended 13 game schedule that stretched from late August to early December. They lost most of their defense last year, and had serious questions about their quarterbacks.

When they beat three ranked teams in a row, were 8-0, and ranked 3rd in the nation, I was truly astonished. Now that they've lost 3 in a row, I'm wondering if they can win another game this season. Their young defense that looked so impressive through 8 games has all but fallen apart. They were not much of a match for West Virginia's 2nd ranked rushing game last night.

The lack of offense hasn't done much either. Mistakes in their field goal kicking have proved disastrous. In last week's Syracuse game, kicker Carter Warley missed two chances to win the game with a field goal. Down 21 to 18 against WVU, the lack of faith in their 9 for 19 kicking game caused them to press the endzone for a win rather than play it safe with a tie going into overtime. Quarterback, Bryan Randall's inexperience showed when he tried to force a pass into the endzone for a win and ended up giving the game away with an interception. Of course, they wouldn't have been in that situation if their offense didn't stall several times prior to that in the red zone.

VT has two games left, against Virginia and Miami. Both will be tough. Virginia is their in-state rival, and is always a tough game. Miami, well, that's Miami. (in the Orange Bowl, at that)

Miami is on upset watch tonight versus Pittsburgh. I think Pitt could pull this game out if their defense does the job. Miami was slow to start against both Boston College and Rutgers. Pitt on the other hand will be playing for their first Big East title. Given that Miami is favored by 21 points, I'll put my money on Pitt any day.

One bright note, Tech tailback Lee Suggs broke an NCAA record by scoring a touchdown in 24 straight games.

One week from today, millions of Americans across the nation will sit down at their dinner table with family and relatives, to celebrate my birthday. I encourage all Americans to feast on turkey, potatoes, and stuffing, while the Cowboys and Lions host their annual football classics, in celebration of the anniversary of my birth.

Thursday, November 28, I turn 30 years old. I've come to terms with turning the big 3 - 0. It doesn't seem to be as bad as I thought it would have been. When I look back on my life and reflect the last 3 decades, there is very little I would change. Sure, I would have tried to wet the bed a bit less, and I would have ducked to avoid missing that 2x4 that split my head open, but other than that, I'm pretty happy about the way things have turned out.

Just 10 years ago I thought that turning 30 would mean the end of life as I know it. Now, in an attempt to put a positive spin on the event, I came up with a modest list of the best things about turning 30.

Turning 30 is great because:

- I don't mind getting carded for beer anymore.

- Since there was no year zero, I'm actually only 29.

- Lower car insurance rates will offset higher life insurance rates.

- I'm still too young to run for President.

- I can finally wear my "I turned 30 and all I got was this stupid T-shirt", T-shirt.

- I may be 30, but my sister is 33. So when I'm 60, she'll be 66.

- Single women my age are just now entering their sexial prime.

- Single women my age are usually pretty desperate.

- With my lack of diet and exercise, I'm officially 'middle aged'.

- I can stop coloring over my grey hair, and just let it go.

- I'm officially allowed to refer to college kids as 'young whipper snappers'.

- Only 25 more years until I can finally respond to those AARP fliers I keep getting in the mail.

- The 'oldies' stations are finally starting to play my kind of music.

- I get to tell kids about the good old days, when MTV played music videos, everyone had a record player, and someday we were going to get cable TV.

- I'm one year closer to the eternal dirt nap.

- And, finally, there is nothing good about turning 30.

Really, I'm ok with it. Turning 30 next Thursday doesn't bother me a bit.

Here are some facts you never hear in main stream media:

"Boys who own legal firearms have much lower rates of delinquency and drug use and are even slightly less delinquent than nonowners of guns." -- U.S. Department of Justice, National Institute of Justice, Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention, NCJ-143454, "Urban Delinquency and Substance Abuse", August 1995.

Here's what a 1995 federal study investigating juvenile crime found after looking at 20,000 randomly selected households:

Relationship between type of gun owned and percent committing street, drug and gun crimes.

Illegal gun:
Street crimes = 74%
Drug use = 41%
Gun crimes = 21%

No gun:
Street crimes = 24%
Drug use = 15%
Gun crimes = 1%

Legal Gun:
Street crimes = 14%
Drug use = 13%
Gun crimes = 0%

Thanks to Gun Defense Clock. Check out their site for more useful information.

Canada began registration and confiscation of firearms several years ago. While gun collectors with proper licenses were grandfathered in, and can legally own and sell firearms in Canada, that doesn't stop the government from seizing firearms and filing charges against even law abiding citizens.

Here is a tragic video story about a Winnepeg man who legally owns over 400 firearms. Despite his compliance with the law, the RCMP are seizing his firearms and charging the owner for 'improper storage' and failure to report 'missing firearms'. The RCMP even brazenly admits their political motivation in claiming that the firearms are designed 'only to kill people.'

Esterbol Rios-Gomez, was a parolee, out after serving 18 months for assault with a knife. Shortly after having stabbed someone else, he broke into the home of Paciano Reyes-Vieyra, the uncle of his ex-girlfriend's new beau. He threatened Vieyra and his family with a knife, and fled the scene.

When Gomez returned to Vieyra's home a second time, he was met with gunfire. Afraid for his and his families safety, Vieyra shot Gomez with his 30-30 lever action hunting rifle. Gomez was hit once in the side, and once in the back, as he tried to flee. Vieyra waited on the front porch for police to arrive. Gomez was taken to the hospital, where he was pronounced DOA.

The incident went before an Oregon grand jury who found the incident a justifiable use of lethal force.

"ASHBURN, Va., Nov. 21 (UPI) -- Washington Coach Steve Spurrier, trying to light a spark under his lethargic offense, has decided to bench Shane Matthews in favor of Danny Wuerffel when the Redskins (4-6) host the St. Louis Cardinals (5-5) on Sunday." -- from the UPI Sports Desk, November 21, 2002.

Do they know something we don't? If the Cardinals are moving back to St. Louis, that may be news to the Rams.

"On Election Day in Massachusetts, which will face an estimated $2 billion deficit next year, voters moved perilously close to a tax revolt that was breathtaking in its mindlessness. Nearly half the voters - 45 percent - supported a ballot proposal to eliminate the state income tax, a move that would have plunged the state into a fiscal emergency." -- Bob Herbert, in a NY Times Op-Ed, November 21, 2002. (emphasis mine)

Mindless: 1 - a: marked by a lack of mind or consciousness b: marked by or displaying no use of the powers of the intellect
2- requiring little attention or thought; especially : not intellectually challenging or stimulating

So, now Herbert thinks that half the voters in the state of Massachusetts (a/k/a Taxachusetts) are mindless. This isn't surprising, as just last week, Herbert praised NYC for the proposed tax hikes, and earlier this month, the Times called the lack of a commuter tax 'unconscionable.'

Funny how a $2 billion deficit is not an emergency, so long as the state has ability to use lethal force to seize the necessary funds. However, when the government's constituents exercise their right of suffrage to limit that ability, it is characterized as a 'mindless revolt'.

Carrollton, Texas has banned toy guns, because officers there cannot tell the difference between toys and the real thing. Rather than properly train their officers to tell the difference between an orange plastic water pistol, and an actual .44 Magnum, they feel it is easier to simply tell kids they can't play with the toys outside.

Of course, it is presented as a 'safety measure'. So please, no protests. It is 'for the children'.

Neal Boortz has long said that controlling and limiting talk radio was on the Democrats 'secret plan for America'. Now Tom Daschle has validated that part of the 'secret plan'. Daschle claims that conservative talk radio is leading to perceived threats against his life. He even likened it to religious fundamentalism. The strange thing is that Daschle is over-reacting now, moreso than when he received the anthrax letter, an actual assassination attempt on his life. He also said they need to increase their presence in talk radio. (Wait, I thought it was 'dangerous'?)

Boortz, and other conservative talk show hosts have often expressed fear that Democrats will push for legislation limiting political speech. A bill similar to Incumbent Protection Act Campaign Finance Reform could be applied to talk radio and media outlets. CFR already limits political speech by members of the general public, 60 days before an election. Historically, democrats have floated the idea of a 'fairness doctrine'. It would mandate 'equal time' for democratic ideals on talk radio.

Once talk radio is conquered, they wont stop there. Certainly the internet is the next step. It may not be long before I'll have to give 'equal time' to some Alan Colmes wanna-be.

UPDATE: As expected, Boortz actually talks about it in today's program notes.

I am mortified to find out that Democrat Underground, and only Democrat Underground is in my neighborhood of blogs, according to blogstreet.

When the Big East joined the BCS coalition, they had a special rule that said conference winners had to average in the Top 12 over four years. It was called the Big East rule, because they weren't deemed as good as the other NCAA major conferences.

Well, not it looks like the Big East is finally starting to get some respect. Miami and Virginia Tech were the perennial favorites, but now teams like Pittsburgh, West Virginia, and Boston College aren't looking so bad. Pittsburgh is in contention with Miami for the conference championship, WVU is 7-3, and BC knocked off a Top 5 Notre Dame team.

As of right now, the Big East has three teams in the Top 16, which is a far cry from where they used to be when they formed in 1992.

Kofi Annan rebuked the U.S. view that Iraq is breaching UN Security Council resolutions by firing on U.S. aircraft. The Guardian (UK) notes that "Mr Annan, entering the fray for the first time since the resolution was passed, was adamant that the anti-aircraft fire did not amount to a breach."

Sadly, Great Britain, whose aircraft are also being fired upon, agrees with Annan.

Our response to the UN position should be clear. The U.S. with cooperation with New York City, should announce that attacks on the UN headquarters building in Manhattan are no longer considered a 'material breach' of the law. Attacks, threats, and break-ins to the UN building will be investigated, in due time, along with equally serious reports of jaywalking, spitting, and littering.

Federal unemployment benefits typically expire after 26 weeks (or 6 months). After 9/11 they were extended another 13 weeks. With federal benefit extensions set to expire December 28, the whining is already starting.

The SFGate reports that 300,000 Californians will lose their federal unemployment benefits on December 28th.

"I don't think it's fair," said San Francisco resident Karen Rothstein, 59, a former cook at Miz Brown's Feed Bag. "The economy hasn't recovered yet. I have some money in an IRA, but I don't want to go into my IRA yet."

I don't blame her. Why spend your own money, or worse, go back to work, when you can suck on the federal teat for a while longer. Rothstein does claim to be hitting the pavement 4 hours per day looking for work. Still, she wants an additional 26 weeks of unemployment benefits.

Despite California having the 4th highest unemployment rate in the nation, Governor Gray-"out" Davis shirks his responsibility off onto the federal government. "Failing to provide additional weeks of benefits to the long-term unemployed would . . . send a bleak message to tens of thousands of California's jobless workers," says Davis. Davis supports Californians going for literally years without working. Instead of working themselves, they are supported by money forcibly seized from those that do work hard every day.

Am I being too heartless here? How is it that a cook, assuming she is a decent cook, cannot find gainful employment for over a year? I think she either sets her standards too high, or she really doesn't want to work. Or, perhaps the California restaurant industry is so rattled by stringent anti-smoking legislation that there really are no jobs left. If that is the case, she needs to MOVE!

Geez, my whole reason for leaving Southeast Virginia was because the job market sucked so bad. I moved to Georgia and then Ohio to further my career. Still, the Californians and other liberals insist on using the police power of the federal government to seize my money at the point of a gun, to line their own pockets. And then, as if 39 weeks, wasn't enough, they are whining for another 26 weeks of 'benefits'!

The New York Post tells a humorous tale of a woman that was assaulted for smoking.

I was walking down Sixth Avenue when a very small woman came barreling across in front of me. She made it look like she was adjusting her backpack, but she reached up and hit me in the arm - hard, with a closed fist.

Stunned and with an aching arm, I quickly walked after her. She turned around, saw my angry face hovering a foot above her, and blurted: "Oh, you want to . . . uh, uh, your god-damn cancer stick."

Right there she admitted that she'd assaulted my body because I was smoking.

... She grabbed her cell phone from her backpack and said she'd call 911. "Good," I said, taking a step closer. "You just assaulted me, and that's illegal. Smoking on the street is not."

At that point, she stepped three feet backward and started kicking at me, coming nowhere near my body.

So, here I am in Midtown, with this weirdo dancing around flailing and kicking at me like a raving lunatic - because of a cigarette.

While not all anti-smoking nazis are violent like this woman, she does personify the entire anti-smoking movement. At least this nut case has the gall to do her own fighting. Most anti-smokers vote to use the police power of the state to enforce their wacky beliefs.

"The damaging oil spill off the coast of Spain is a sobering reminder that the world's heavy reliance on oil for energy carries environmental risks that need more urgent attention than they have been getting. This was an accident just waiting to happen..." -- NY Times, November 20, 2002.

"The damaging forest fires in California, Oregon, Washington, Arizona, South Dakota, et. al, is a sobering reminder that the nation's adherence to enviro-wacko policies against logging and deforestation carry serious environmental risks that need more urgent attention than they have been getting. This was an accident just waiting to happen..." -- Ravenwood's Universe, November 20, 2002.

At least Tom Daschle is looking out for South Dakotans, making sure they can step up their efforts to thin forests before they go up in flames. Of course, the rest of us are just shit out of luck. (I wish we all had a Senator like Daschle)

This can't be good for me. As a frequent flier on Delta who is used to frequent flier perks at discount prices, I am very worried. This will allow Delta to further differentiate their travelers, allowing them to charge more money for people that fly 'Regular Delta'. If you want discounted fares, you'll be banished to 'Delta Light', where there is no first class seating, no priority boarding, no nothing.

New Jersey is working on passing a bill to mandate 'smart technology' into all handguns sold within the state. Of course, 'smart technology' hasn't been invented yet. Basically, they are trying to pull a 'california' and drive the production of handguns for everyone nation wide. (California does the same thing with automotive emissions and fuel standards.)

Of course, if guns with 'smart' technology are developed, they will be several hundred dollars more expensive than they are now, which is just fine with the gun grabbers. The more people that cannot afford to defend themselves, the better.

The impact on crime will be negligible. Criminals don't usually get their firearms through regular retailers, and given the amount of 'dumb' guns that are out there, they will still have an ample supply of firearms to stick in your face.

This week's Carnival of the Vanities is published at:

Silflay Hraka and Blogcrititics

Hangings may soon return to New Jersey. No, I'm not talking capital punishment, I'm talking tax revolt. Homeowners in Milburn Township, NJ are planning to secede to a neighboring county, rather than face a property tax hike of up to $3000 per household.

When taxes get out of control, why should the electorate have to take it on the chin from their local politicians? (or any politicians for that matter.) String a few of these guys up by their feet, and add a nice new coat of tar and feathers and they'll get the message.

"It's OK, I do it all the time" -- Matt George, showing off to his buddies, about to kiss his pet rattlesnake.

"I'm going to die" -- Matt George, shortly after being bit on the lip by his pet rattlesnake.

George didn't die however, ruining his chances to win this year's Darwin Award.

All the controversy and belly aching over the Homeland Security Bill, and it passes 90-9.

CNN reports that Ted Kennedy, D-Massachusetts; Paul Sarbanes, D-Maryland; Jim Jeffords, I-Vermont; Daniel Akaka, D-Hawaii; Daniel Inouye, D-Hawaii; Robert Byrd, D-West Virginia; Carl Levin, D-Michigan; Ernest "Fritz" Hollings, D-South Carolina; and Russ Feingold, D-Wisconsin voted against the bill, and Sen. Frank Murkowski, R-Alaska, was not in Washington for the vote.

On the surface, it would appear that my position against the electronic tracking of sexual predators seems to clash with my position of being tough in criminals. In fact, just the opposite is true.

First of all, I feel that if a person commits a heinous crime, there shouldn't be any tracking necessary. They should be right there in their prison cell (or grave site). That should be especially true for predatory crimes and murder.

The fact that a person is out of prison and walking around among the living, to me, implies that they are fit to be welcomed back into society and shouldn't need to be tracked. At the very least it should imply that they are no longer a danger to society. If they are no longer a danger, what is the point of using electronic monitoring? If they are, why are they being released in the first place?

When it comes to sexual predators, they are easy to pick on. Nobody likes them, and people with children tend to really, really hate them. That is why I think that this is just a first step in the tracking of all persons. They already assign everyone a unique number at birth and use it to keep a lifetime "permanent record". Britain already goes so far as to put cameras on every corner to monitor their populace. To me, this just seems to be the next logical step.

Maybe I am being paranoid, but if I were a big government agency whose agenda included tracking my populace, this is how I'd implement it.

Now, where'd I leave my tin-foil hat?

CD Harris should use this as next week's caption of the day. I don't know what Michael was thinking, but he's certainly not going to win Father of the Year.

UPDATE: Taranto notes that Reuters carries this photo under "entertainment".

"We live on an island. A giant big fucking island. We don't understand that people actually get mad at us. We still think of ourselves in terms of WW2. It's not uncommon for us to say to France, 'Hey, you'd still be speaking German if it wasn't for us.' The problem is the world has changed, and our involvement in these tiny little places is different than it was in 1941. It was a lot clearer then. We were attacked." -- George Clooney on why we shouldn't fight Iraq or the War on Terrorism.

My staff writers want me to point out that Clooney probably knows what he's talking about. After all, he fought the Japanese in The Thin Red Line, and Saddam Hussein in Three Kings.

I bought 350 rounds of ammo today.

200 - .40 S&W FMJ
100 - .22 WMR JHP
40 - 7.62 x 39 FMJ
10 - 12 ga. slugs

Please show your support as well and buy at least 100 rounds for Ammo Day.

Dennis Prager writes a brilliant column about the hypocrisy of the anti-smoking nazis. He is inspired by the idiocy of the commotion surrounding the latest James Bond film. Bond films are filled with sexual titillation and innuendo, violence, murder, and even the consumption of alcohol, but it is his cigar smoking that gathers all the protests. Prager asks:

Would you rather be raised by a parent addicted to cigarettes or addicted to alcohol?

Would you rather your pilot smoked a cigarette/cigar/pipe before or during a flight or drank an alcoholic beverage before or during a flight?

Has anyone ever been beaten, murdered or abused because someone was under the influence of a cigarette, cigar or pipe?

We'll have to ask Michele about that last one. She was voted most likely to beat someone to within an inch of their life over her not having a cigarette.

An oil tanker broke in two off the coast of Spain, and the spillage could be twice the size of the Exxon Valdez spill. Hopefully the damage will be contained, but I couldn't help but notice that the existing damage to animals is mainly limited to 'sea birds' who have been 'taken for treatment'.

As someone who grew up on the ocean, I can honestly say, that one less sea bird is a good thing. Several hundred less 'sea birds' is a great thing. These birds are disgusting, vile creatures that I liken to rats and vermin. The only good birds are those that are worth eating (chickens and the like), and those that help control insect and rat populations (owls and the like). The others mainly feed on garbage and dead carcasses. I know, scavenging is a necessary job, but a few hundred less scavengers isn't going to hurt anyone.

To me, 'rescuing' animals that are suffering seems like a huge waste of resources. It would be much more efficient to euthanize the poor bastards and go about cleaning up the beaches. What it comes down to is that they are dumb animals, and their life, like all life, was finite to begin with. Cleaning them up and releasing them back into the ocean does a lot to warm the hearts of tree huggers, but little to restore nature's life cycle.

I have a question for these tree hugging, bed wetting, environmentalist wackos that go out and 'rescue' animals like this. Do you 'rescue' all life, or just the cute and fuzzy mammals and birds? What about any insects, worms, and microscopic creepy crawlies that are coated with a good slick of oil? Are they to be saved, or do you simply squash the bugs while running after the birds? Don't answer, I already know the hypocritical truth.

Hollywood actor James Coburn has died. My favorite movies of his included: The Magnificant Seven, Great Escape, Midway, and Maverick. I'll forgive him for those 'Flint' superspy movies. I realize they were a product of their time. (not my time.)

Please support Ammo Day. Purchase at least 100 rounds of ammo today, and report your results to the Ammo Day website.

I think that one of the sexiest things a woman can do is learn how to properly handle a firearm. My ex-girlfriend, Jennifer, was not afraid to handle my 12-gauge, and would often go trap shooting with us in college. Despite the recoil and her small 120lb frame, she was able to tame the firearm, and shoot accurately with just a little bit of practice. Jennifer, however, was the exception to the rule.

Most women today fear firearms. They are taught by society that guns are for men. They are told that guns are complicated devices, that they are not intelligent enough to operate. Women are led to believe that firearms are powerful tools that they don't have the strength to handle. Gun grabbers like Sarah Brady would have women believe that they are more likely to be disarmed by an attacker and have their firearm used against them, than they are able to properly defend themselves.

In fact, firearms are the great equalizer, because even a 6' 6" 350lb attacker is bound to be slowed down by a sucking chest wound. A woman, properly trained to use a firearm, could very easily neutralize an attacker three or four times her size. Gun grabbers would rather tell a woman to call 911, or try to gouge out the eyes of a would-be rapist. Unfortunately, police only respond quickly enough to actually prevent 5% of crime. Most of the time they arrive too late and are left to simply investigate the crime after the fact; which isn't very comforting to the victim (assuming she is still alive). Personally, I think it's much more efficient to squeeze off a double-tap to the chest and then call police to mop up his body. It certainly cuts down on the investigative work.

As for complexity, handguns are surprisingly simplistic. Any dealer hoping to make a sale will take a few minutes to teach a customer to properly strip the firearm down for cleaning. Many handguns need only to break down into a half dozen parts to be properly cleaned and maintained. As for shooting proficiency, a day or two out at the range should be enough to teach the basic skills needed. A professionally taught NRA safety course typically runs about $50, which isn't much considering the cost of a quality handgun.

If worse comes to worse, you could just ask someone at the range for help. Despite the images portrayed by the gun lobby, firearms owners are not all nuts. In fact, comradery is almost always shown to other firearms owners, and most guys would be more than happy to share their knowledge of firearms, shooting proficiency, and safety. Especially to a woman.

Obviously firearms aren't for every woman. Maturity is arguably more important than skill, especially for self-defense. (Hell, there are plenty of men out there that aren't mature enough to properly handle a firearm.) Anyone who intends to use a firearm for self defense needs to be prepared to use it once it is drawn. Even though over 90% of defensive gun uses require simply brandishing a firearm, drawing your gun against an attacker is always risky; more so if you are not prepared to back up your threat with real force.

Still, whenever I hear about some scumbag would-be rapist that gets his nuts blown off while trying to overpower a woman half his size, I can't help but smile. I know that there was a woman who was not afraid to take a stand in personal responsibility and self defense. There was a woman who would thumb her nose at the Sarah Brady's of the world; people that would tell a woman that they should let themselves be raped. They should beg an attacker for mercy, and then sit back and wait for police to round up the asshole, try him, convict him, and send him to jail for punishment and/or rehabilitation. There was a woman who knows it is her God-given right to defend herself. It is her duty to try to prevent herself from being violated in the first place.

As for the cowardly asshole who preys on the weak, he deserves what he gets.

Footnotes - This article by the Independent Women's Forum should be required reading of all women. This site is a good reference for the concealed carry laws in your state, however you should always check with your local attorney general's office or law enforcement body to ensure you are in compliance with applicable laws.

Bill Wyman, real name William George Perks, of the Rolling Stones has sent a cease and desist letter to Bill Wyman, real name Bill Wyman, ordering him to stop using his own name. Wyman, who was born in 1961 has used the name ever since his parents put in on his birth certificate. He's written music and entertainment reviews for about 20 years, and currently writes for the AJC. Perks of the Rolling Stones has used the name since 1963. Still, Perks is arrogant enought to think that he has more claim to his stage name than Wyman has to his real name.

(This reminds me of when Madonna applied for a trademark.)

Yet another "What ___ are you?" quiz.

It turns out that I'm Atlanta. This really upsets me, because I just moved away from Atlanta in June. What the hell was I thinking!? I was homesick for Atlanta before, but now I found out that it was perfect for me! sigh.

(link via da Goddess)

My other cities were Chicago (cool, but WAY too liberal), Dallas (great, except I'm a 'Skins fan), and L.A. (BWAHAHAHA!!!)

Apparently the Chinese censors are on the ball. I used this tool a few months ago, and my site was accessible in China. Joanie posted it this week, so I tried again. Lo and behold, I've been banned in China.

That certainly explains my low hit counter. Over 1/6th of the world population is BANNED from viewing my site! How is that for an ego buster. Now if I can only get India to ban me, that'll be a full 1/3rd.

Let this be a warning to all my readers. You should read as much as possible now, before I'm banned in the U.S. as well.

I was going to write a rant good enough to inspire a Chinese uprising that would rival the Tiananmen Square revolt, but now I figure, why bother.

Whenever I read other peoples weblogs I usually see things that I missed, or wish that I had said. And then there's CGHill and his headlines:

(I Can't Get No) Punctuation
A bridge too fallible
A reminiscence of sorts
I'll take Character Assassination for $200
No Peking
E pluribus units
A pack of Peter Parkers
The War of 1812 is over, too
Weapon of mass distraction
A Goofy comparison?
Being objective about subjectivity
The power of pasta

I could keep going. Not to take anything away from his postings and content, but I am insanely jealous over his knack for writing catchy headlines.

I wonder how much time he spends on it. When I write a weblog entry, I typically go for speed. I type it out at about 60 wpm, do a quick spellcheck, come up with a quick headline, add any hyperlinks, post, and I'm done. The whole process is pretty quick actually.

Every once in a while, I'll post and see how it looks once it's published. (I just cannot get the 'feel' for it using the 'preview' button, plus the preview doesn't always handle any html I've added) Sometimes I'll go back to an entry and make an edit, publish, make another edit, publish, edit it again, publish.. you get the idea. But I rarely re-visit the headline after the first go 'round. Perhaps I should.

They describe him as 'job hunting'. Apparently he wasn't hunting too hard. Perhaps it was that extra 13 weeks of unemployment that allowed him to master his craft.

The AP notes that "first prize was $1,200, a video game system and a gold medal." That should keep him unemployed for a few more weeks.

(I saw this story earlier but neglected to comment on it. When I saw Simon's neat Online Rock-Paper-Scissors game, I felt inspired, so credit him for the link.)

This weekend, I looked at my raw hits and noticed that Saturday had unusually high traffic. At the time I felt guilty for taking most of the weekend off from blogging.

A little research today, (actually I got around to checking my referrer logs) showed that I got 'Bill Quick'ed on Friday night.

That is probably the highest profile link I've received to date. (Not that I'm fishing for one..)

Britain is considering tagging sex offenders with a tracking device. You can imagine the horror this instills in civil libertarians. Today it is sex offenders, but who will it be tomorrow?

The Observer article notes that not only can movement be tracked, but vital signs such as heart rate and blood pressure.

The New York Sun notes that those 'spending cuts' proposed by Mayor Bloomberg and echoed by the New York Times are actually spending increases. New York's budget is slated to be $43.3 Billion (that's 43,300 million), an increase of more than $1 Billion over last year's budget. The financial plan calls for increases every year through 2006 when it will reach $46.4 Billion.

It is interesting that the NY Times considers the lack of a commuter tax "unconscionable", but steep tax hikes in the wake of budget increases "a rare profile in courage."

So, how is it that the left calls a spending increase a spending cut? Simple, they had planned on increasing spending say, 6%, but now are only increasing it 3%, so they call it a cut. They did the same thing with Bush's first federal budget, when they whined about across the board cuts in federal programs. In fact, not one single program received less funding than it did the year before.

It is the same logic Tom Daschle, D-SD used last week on "On the Record" with Greta Van Susteren to refer to his 3.1% increase in congressional pay as "not a raise."

Randall Wright was house-sitting for a friend when two would-be armed robbers forced their way into the house. Wright pulled out a gun and pleaded with the robbers to back off, but they would not. One shouted "kill him, kill him," and gunfire broke out. One gunman fled the scene, but the other was left wounded and died later from his sucking chest wounds.

The man who fled was later apprehended and is being held by police. While some states charge the surviving accomplices* with first degree murder, South Carolina is not one of those states.

* Ohio, for instance will charge a co-conspirator with murder if their accomplice dies while committing a crime.

John Leo offers up some nice "euphamisms and upscale name changes." Here are a few:

Comparative ads: attack ads
Traffic-calming road insertions: speed bumps
In-depth interrogation: torture
Visual harassment: staring
Derivative passages: plagiarism
Verbal abuse: criticism
Abductees (in Sudan): slaves
Tribal chief: swarthy, non-English-speaking leader you admire
Warlord: swarthy, non-English-speaking leader you do not admire
Self-sacrifice bombers: suicide bombers
Cultural genocide: correcting a pupil's nonstandard English
Multicultural issues editor: censor
Psychological violence: disapproval
Creating personal accounts: privatizing Social Security
Unpaid sex worker: wife
Sexual service provider: paid sex worker, hooker
Death tax: inheritance tax
Pregnancy-related services: abortion
Action figures: dolls for boys
Spouse equivalent: lover
Polyamory: wild promiscuity
Nontraditional sex: perversions
Hemp activist: pot promoter
Problem-plagued: drug-addled
Post-verdict response: riot
Uprising: a riot you approve of
Granted "access" to my body (Boston clerical term): had sex with a young male
Occupant restraints: seat belts
Race-sensitive programs: preferences, quotas
Faith-based organizations: religious organizations
Deer management: shooting all the deer
Activity intolerance: lower back pain
Economic profiling: getting turned down for a loan because of a poor credit rating
Made possible by: We don't take advertising, but here comes an ad anyway
Relationship manager: salesperson
Persistency specialist: bill collector
Tactical pricing: panicky price cuts
Mainstreaming (journalese): quoting one member of every race, gender, orientation and ethnic group in all news reports, even ones about ailing turtles, bad weather or Martha Stewart
Lifestyle and fitness competition: Miss America's swimsuit competition
The (nongendered) monarchy, the power and the glory: the (patriarchal) kingdom, the power and the glory
Creator, Redeemer, Sustainer: Father, Son, Holy Spirit
Involuntary normal attrition: laying off workers
Managing down: laying off workers
Rightsizing: laying off workers
Job survivor: person not yet rightsized, attrited or managed down

Homeschoolers in the Chicago area are getting quite a rude awakening. The superintendent of schools is sending squad cars out to people's homes to demand that they attend a 'pre-trial' hearing. The hearing will demand that homeschoolers prove that they are in compliance with the law?

Whatever happened to burden of proof? And why does education have to be government sanctioned anyway? Whatever happened to the good old pioneer days and one-room school houses? There was no gestapo going around making people prove their compliance with the law. This is typical fascist intimidation tactics. Heaven forbid someone should want to pull their kid away from government hands.

Nevermind the fact that home-schooled kids usually get a much better education. When is the last time a government school kid won a national spelling bee?

Remember that professor from Xavier who went off on the Air force Cadet?

Well, last week he was relieved of his teaching obligations because of the incident.

If Xavier was able to move so fast, why wasn't Emory able to fire Bellesiles sooner?

There is a lot of buzz in the air about a Gore-Hillary ticket in 2004. Who would be the undercard here? Is Hillary really going to settle for Veep, or will Al once again be second fiddle on the Clinton-Gore ticket?

Either way, I hope they run.

Neal points out that we ought to call a spade a spade. The latest proposals for socialized medicine are actually fascist and not social in nature. Socialism means government ownership, where as fascism means private ownership with government authority and control.

I stand corrected Neal, and will henceforth use the proper terminology.